Long before global warming menaced the public on the big screen, there were sharks. Big and bad with flesh-ripping teeth and huge appetites, they swim to the tune of ominous music and stoke the primal fears that make watching these ultimate monster movies so much fun. Grab some popcorn and have a seat — these are the top ten you have to see.
In the tradition of movies like Lake Placid that we love to watch just to hear Betty White swear, a couple of drinks and a freak storm dropping sharks on Los Angeles is undeniable fun.
Based on a true story of a couple trying to rekindle their romance with a scuba adventure, this low budget thriller has nothing special to offer but gut-gripping, sleep-defying fear. Watch it in the morning.
Blake Lively stars in this campy woman versus shark tale that’s both funny and futile on a personal level. It doesn’t have much to offer, but you’ll feel better about your life after.
With water, blood and preppies demonstrating why they shouldn’t be given the keys to a yacht, The Reef takes itself way too seriously, but is still worth the ride.
Deep Blue Sea
This is the cruel and usual scientist-makes-breeding-blunder story that just won’t go away. Check your brain at the door and just revel in the blood and guts.
47 Meters Down
Mandy Moore and Clair Holt try to avoid being lunch in this low-budget flick. The ideas are high octane, but the execution isn’t. Still, it’s a great excuse to mow through a bucket of popcorn.
It’s Sharknado meets Lost as a group of tsunami survivors become part of the meat counter at a flooded grocery store. It’s embarrassingly cliché and utterly devoid of terror, but it’s shamelessly funny and won’t keep you up at night.
If you harbor any high school angst and want to see the kids you hated get shredded like pulled pork for sandwiches, it’s your turn. The severed body parts layered between the sexual innuendos is the foundation for a parade of endless horror movie stereotypes that like a train wreck, can’t help but hold your attention.
Mega Shark VS. Giant Octopus
If you wondered what Debbie Gibson did after her 80’s hits stopped generating revenue, she changed her named to Deborah and made a film so bad that it’s sure to be a bonding moment with someone at the asylum.
This Spielberg-fueled nightmare is still the king of the hill after more than four decades. The cast was average and by today’s standards, so was the shark, but the simplicity of this man versus Great White story and directing second only to Hitchcock was enough to scare a whole generation out of the water. It’s the benchmark against which all other monster movies are measured.
Logan Sekulow is a producer and director who’s known for relaunching Laugh-O-Gram studios.